I used to live my life assuming that you are doing your best.
Because when I changed to that way of believing (I didn’t always think this way), I was the one freed, not so angry at the world because people suck and aren’t meeting my expectations.
The crux of believing that someone is doing their best is that sometimes someone’s best is not good enough for us. Which means we have to find what we need somewhere else.
I now live my life knowing that you are doing your best.
Because when we know better, we do better (Maya Angelou) and because for the last three years, I have lived with pain that would bring most people to their knees on a daily basis, and yet most people would never know it or see it when they meet me.
My best the last three years, has not been good enough for many people in my life.
And I have just been trying to stay alive.
Yesterday, my pain felt like I needed to have seven teeth pulled. It even hurt to drink water. I wanted to rip the left side of my skull away.
I did my best.
My best probably wasn’t quite good enough for some.
And it is what I had.
You don’t know what someone is fighting. You don’t know what hurt or worry they are living with. You don’t know what it takes for them to show up in the world.
Living with the knowing of generosity doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to have all your feelings about someone’s best not being good enough for you or that you don’t hold them accountable to hurting you or not doing their job, for example.
It simply means you do so and meet everyone with care, compassion, love, and generosity.
Because if you haven’t noticed, there are a lot of people who are struggling and very tired. Or are in so much pain they want to rip half their head off.