the unspoken is never benign

This week I worked with two different organizations both of which are part of industries that tend to put being polite and professional over being kind, clear, and courageous.

Except when we front with polite and professional when trying to have tough conversations, especially conversations around holding people accountable, we often aren’t saying the thing that actually needs to be said.

Which means the unspoken is running the show.
Because the unspoken is never benign.

It also means that too often people stay stuck and struggle to change, meet expectations, and give us what we want and need.

All because we chose politeness over being clear.

At this point, I am not sure there is any organization that doesn’t have tough accountability conversations that need to be had.

We can be kind by being clear, we can hold people accountable with courage, and we must ask for what we want and need speaking expectations. We also must recognize when our own emotions or discomfort with vulnerability stands in the way of these courageous conversations because too often it is this discomfort that makes us want to front and armor up.