Episode 47: Stop Shrinking Yourself and Start Showing Up Fully
In this episode of Courage Is Built Here, Justine welcomes Precious Whitener to Pathway Three, Be Fully You, for a conversation about authenticity, confidence, and the courage to stop shrinking yourself. Precious shares how she reached a point in her career when she realized she had put herself “on the shelf,” holding back her ideas, voice, confidence, and willingness to push back in order to fit into the environments around her.
Together, Justine and Precious explore what it takes to reclaim those parts of yourself one at a time. Precious explains how she learned to stop outsourcing responsibility for her reactions when triggers arise and instead ask herself what she wants to do and how she wants to respond. While she cannot control how someone else behaves, she can choose to remain grounded in her own courage, curiosity, and authenticity.
They also discuss the importance of healthy pushback and why conflict does not automatically have to mean disconnection. Precious shares how she approaches disagreement by “respectfully challenging” what she believes needs to change, whether that means advocating for someone whose voice is not being heard, speaking up when something lacks integrity, or asking whether a decision truly serves the collective goal. Together, she and Justine explore how healthy friction can lead to growth, innovation, and stronger relationships.
Precious also opens up about another unexpected act of courage: allowing herself to love again. After letting past hurt determine what she believed was possible for seven years, she chose to lean back into her values and open herself to something new. That experience taught her to prepare herself for the best instead of always preparing for the worst. Ultimately, her journey has also meant learning to recognize the value she brings and entering spaces without apologizing for knowing who she is.
Key Takeaways
- Pathway Three, Be Fully You, asks us to show up authentically while recognizing that vulnerability still requires healthy boundaries.
- Shrinking yourself to fit a workplace or relationship can slowly chip away at your confidence, effectiveness, and sense of who you are.
- Reclaiming yourself does not happen all at once. It can mean taking your confidence, ideas, values, voice, and advocacy “off the shelf” one piece at a time.
- You cannot always control what triggers you or how someone else behaves, but you can choose how you respond.
- Authenticity does not have to depend on someone else’s willingness to be authentic. You can choose not to abandon or shrink yourself because of how another person shows up.
- Pushback can be an act of courage when it means advocating for others, protecting integrity, and respectfully challenging what needs to change.
- Conflict and challenge do not have to be destructive. When handled through values and courage, friction can lead to growth, creativity, and better outcomes.
- Leadership is not only about what people see you do. It is also about what people experience and how they feel after interacting with you.
- Past hurt can limit what you believe is possible when you allow it to define where you are willing to go next.
- Courage can mean preparing yourself for the best instead of always preparing for the worst.
- Showing up fully includes recognizing that you bring value and no longer apologizing for knowing what you have to offer.
About the Guest
Precious Whitener is a Dale Carnegie trainer, bestselling author, and passionate advocate for helping people recognize their value and show up fully in their lives and work. Grounded in her values of courage and curiosity, Precious brings authenticity, advocacy, and a commitment to helping others grow into every space she enters. In this conversation, she shares how learning to stop shrinking herself, reclaim her confidence, and respectfully challenge what needs to change has transformed the way she approaches her career, relationships, and leadership.
Connect with Precious:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ItsPreciousSimone/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/precioussimoneinspires/
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