|  Blog Post   |  Are You Reacting Rather Than Responding to Your Life?

Are You Reacting Rather Than Responding to Your Life?

For years I have talked with clients about choosing to not live their lives from a place of fearFear is often something we suffer through, push down, numb out and allow to hold us back and dim our light.

Consciously living my life, practicing my recovery, I choose every day to live my life from a place of love and not fear. Some days this work is easy, some days it feel nearly impossible.

Through this work I have also discovered that this has everything to do with how I connect with the people in my life and the world.

The difference between responding and reacting

When we react we come from a place of fear.

When we respond we come from a place of love.

My work in ever upward includes making sure I live everything and every day from the place of love. It is making sure I respond and not react.


Before the work of my recovery, before surviving IVF, I reacted to my life.

And, I reacted a lot.

I used to be called angry. To which I angrily replied that I was just passionate. But, now as I live the work and practice of recovery, I now have the language.

I was living my life from the place of fear.

The place of never being good enough.

The place of always comparing myself to others.

The place of I’m too much, you don’t love it and I don’t love it, and therefore I am scared of it.


After the work, especially in the last year of my recovery, which includes The Daring Way™ work, I have learned that this reacting doesn’t truly honor who I am or who I want to be.

I am passionate. I am determined. I am ever upward.

And, this means actively choosing to live from a place of love. It means actively choosing to respond.

When I respond to my life, rather than react…

I will always be enough.

I won’t need to compare because I am incomparable.

And, my too much is exactly just right.

An intention of wholeheartedness


Some may think reacting and responding look the same to the outside person. However, I think if we really make this choice to live from a place of love and to respond to our lives rather than to live from a place of fear and to react to our lives what we put into the world will be a much more accurate picture of who we are and who we want to be. In the least, I know my intention between the two feels completely different to me. Living my life from a place of love means I move through the fear and I don’t live from it. It means I am living with the intention of wholeheartedness and moving ever upward.

And, I promise, no I guarantee, only amazing things can be born of that.



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If you found this post enjoyable, inspiring, helpful, hopeful, interesting or even infuriating ;), please take the time and the chance to share it through your social media! More shares means more eyes, means more people helped and the message heard on a wider scale. Thank you! Justine


Justine is a Licensed Professional Counselor with more than 25 years of experience in traditional mental health and personal and professional development. Justine has been certified in the work of Dr. Brené Brown for ten years. Justine is the author of eleven books, including five Amazon bestsellers covering subjects such as infertility, faith, and grief. She has been honored to do two TEDx Talks, The Permission of the And and The Donut Effect. She travels nationally and presents virtually to global audiences delivering keynotes, workshops, retreats, and trainings on topics such as leadership, courage, resilience, mental health, preventing and coping with burnout, and courageous and curious conversation, especially in creating cultures of belonging and diversity, equity, and inclusion. Justine lives in St. Louis with her husband Chad, their three dogs, and for four months of the year hundreds of monarch and swallowtail butterflies.

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