|  Blog Post   |  How are you feeling loved by me?

How are you feeling loved by me?

When was the last time you asked the people you lead and work alongside how they feel appreciated by you?

This month nearly every year can feel tough for my husband Chad and me due to work schedules, gloomy winter, and for me, old hurts that mostly have nothing to do with him.

A tough season also means we have tough check-in conversations, including the question that always helps us to circle back to one another:

How are you feeling loved by me?

And this got me thinking…
When was the last time you asked the people you lead and work alongside how they feel appreciated by you?

We often think the things we say and do to show appreciation are enough, except often those things aren’t in the way the person best receives love and appreciation.

For example, my husband Chad may think that doing small things around the house like taking out the trash and cleaning off my ice-covered car helps me feel loved. Which, of course, they do help… And when he texts me in the middle of his busy day to say hi and ask how my day is…well, for me, that’s feeling very seen and loved.

What if today, you asked your people: How do you feel appreciated/loved by me?


Justine is a Licensed Professional Counselor with more than 25 years of experience in traditional mental health and personal and professional development. Justine has been certified in the work of Dr. Brené Brown for ten years. Justine is the author of eleven books, including five Amazon bestsellers covering subjects such as infertility, faith, and grief. She has been honored to do two TEDx Talks, The Permission of the And and The Donut Effect. She travels nationally and presents virtually to global audiences delivering keynotes, workshops, retreats, and trainings on topics such as leadership, courage, resilience, mental health, preventing and coping with burnout, and courageous and curious conversation, especially in creating cultures of belonging and diversity, equity, and inclusion. Justine lives in St. Louis with her husband Chad, their three dogs, and for four months of the year hundreds of monarch and swallowtail butterflies.

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